literature

Goodbye, But Not So Much.

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kimrimiphantomhive's avatar
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Literature Text

Dear Wonderfully Super Amazing Person, (Bri)

Hai! I'm supposed to be asleep right now, but... Well, that didn't happen. I feel very frustrated at the moment, going over and over my entire vocabulary for a better word or words for 'goodbye' and none seem right. I'm an author, not having words is... Unsettling, to say the least.

A while back, my CTHEI class did a stupid little quiz-ish-thingie on weather or not we abused technology. I, of course, do and am proud. Anyway. (There's a point to this, I swear.) One of the questions was, and I'm paraphrasing, “If a friend you were very close too moved away, how would you say goodbye to them?” The answer choices were simple enough, supposed to be funny but weren't. Me and Kat laughed and made up our own answers, and mine was, naturally, “Farewell, old friend~! Do not forget to remember me! *dramatic sob*”

But, now, that doesn't quite seem appropriate. Goodbye seems too formal, too little said, not enough feeling, and altogether too final. See you soon implies that one will in fact see the other within a certain amount of time, determined by that person's definition of 'soon' and just leaves both parties confused. I've got this whole scenario planned out in my head of tomorrow -well, later today, at this point- and how I've got this elaborate good-memories thing and it all seems like something I'd do in a story of mine. I still have to figure the order, but anyway.

I'm going to miss you. This much you already knew. I have no plan for what I'll do in 8th period, I'll get so depressed without you. Especially since it's after English. And, though it may not seem like it, Marian's going to miss you too. Carolyn, Chris, Aaron, (both of them). What are we going to do  without you? I'm being selfish and not letting any of them know about my plan for tomorrow 'cause I don't want any of them to out-do me.

I suppose, in a way, we've all been selfish, telling you how much we'll miss you and how we won't know what to do with ourselves after you leave. We haven't considered how you feel, it's harder on you than any of us. You're the one who's gotta make all new friends and replace us all, -and if I didn't know you as well as I do, I'd say it'd be easy. But I do, and that makes it all the harder, knowing what you've been through and knowing that, not only do you have to go through it again, in the bitchiest years of all, but that I won't be there to help you through it.

I'm so sorry.

Sorry I can't be there, for all the times I wasn't there, and for all the times I won't be there.

I'm sorry you have to do this alone and I want you to know that if you ever need anything ever you can always come to me. I've always tried to be a good friend, but I don't think I could ever match the friend you've been to me. Ever.

You're probably the single best best friend I've ever had, and I've been whiny and put you through shit you didn't need to go through, pushed and pulled you, hurt you when you needed comfort and I....

Just don't know what to say. You'll always be with me. A part of me and my personality that wouldn't exist without you.

So, in light of all this, I can only say one thing.
Goodbye, but not so much.
Um... So, yeah.
I'm kinda sobbing right now.
But. Yep.
My friend, Bri, is moving away today and it's very possible that our only communication will be Skype since she doesn't have a phone and her mom's now exactly the most screwed-in light bulb of the chandelier. It probably won't be as sad to those of you who don't know her well, (which is most of you) but anyway. So, I wrote her this letter and figured, hey, why not see how many other people I can make cry?
I made :iconunicornmaster127: and :iconcelebi159: (who almost never show emotions other than foolishness) come damn near close to it and me and Bri were sobbing our hearts out while the rest of our French class was learning the differences between feminine and masculine ways of addressing people. So.... Yeah.
Forgive me for not submitting and not replying to comments, 'cause this is what I've been doing (along with planning the single most intricate of going-away presents EVER.) I'll try to get to y'all today or tomorrow, but I'll be a bit slow for a day or so.
Thanks~!
© 2013 - 2024 kimrimiphantomhive
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SuperDoki92's avatar
Oh my God. So that's what that letter said. Bri never let me read it T^T